Bad Roommates

 

  Oh, boy. I have so much to say on this subject. I always have the worst of luck when it comes to the people I live with. I think my fiance is the only decent roommate I’ve had since venturing out on my own! Let me give you an idea of the type of people I have lived with.
Girl A: she always on some crazy drugs, ranted about the strangest subjects, loud in the middle of the night, dirtied up the common area, never cleaned, and slept with strange boys on our couch (I only walked in a couple of times).
Girl B: she was a little more courteous, polite, loud, a follower, always intoxicated or drunk, always sick, and sometimes cleaned.
Girl C: Oh my, I could go on and on about this one. She’s my current roommate and my fiance and I speak her name with a distaste on our tongue. One of the worst humans ever, covered our living room with her sister’s things, doesn’t clean, doesn’t pay for anything, a bully, extremely loud, gets ready with her feet a sink of water, and a mean person.
   It’s hard to be out on your own and it’s even harder when you’re living with bad people on top of it! After about a year of dealing with bad roommates, I’ll share with you strategies and tips that have helped me get through the bad.

Strategies and Tips

  1. Avoid an outright war. You need to be adults and not give into your hormones. Controlling your emotions will enable you to come to an amicable solution. Keep calm and don’t overreact. Don’t gossip between mutual friends since this’ll cause more issues than before.
  2. Chat with the BR (Bad Roommate) about your concerns and compile a list of steps towards your desired solution. You’re stuck with the BR so you might as well make it as decent as possible. 
  3. If talking between each other is proving to be too difficult, get a mediator. Don’t choose someone biased in any way. If you’re living in dorms, get an RA to lead the discussion and help to come to a solution. If you’re renting property, talk to the landlord or owner’s reps (leasing office in an apartment complex as an example) to figure out an answer.
  4. Realize your options. You can either stay to deal with it, figure it out, or leave. 
  5. When nothing works and there’s continuous problems, talk to a person of authority at your complex, dorms, etc. about moving to a different apartment, room, or other so you are able to get away. There are always ways of leaving your unit. Be prepared that there may be fees and the cost of moving to take into consideration. 
  Unfortunately, BRs are a part of life. You don’t know a person truly until you’ve lived with them. I learned that my old best friend was bipolar and mentally unstable after a couple of months of living together. I don’t wish this on you but be picky on who you choose to live with because it can cost you financially, mentally, emotionally, and/or physically. Appreciate your good roommates because they are far and few in between. 
An important tip: Set up boundaries and expectations before choosing to get a new home together. Set up rules so future issues can be dealt with in a healthy manner. 
Have any fun stories to share?
xo,
H.
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