Living away from home is one of the most emotionally confusing phases of the young adult life. You feel excitement mostly but faintly sad over leaving everything and everyone you know. There’s the thrill of venturing through life untethered to our parents, living a life catered to the independent individual, and figuring out who in the world that person is we see in the mirror. Living away from the majority of my family has taught me a great deal of lessons that I would never learn under their wing. Many of them were extremely hard but in order to grow as a person, I had to go through it. Despite those hardships, I’m forever grateful for all of the knowledge I gained. Without this past year teaching me so much about who I am and the world around me, I would be stuck as the old me and that’s the scariest part about it.
The biggest lesson that my mother has been preaching about since I got my first debit card was to save up as much as you can. As a young adult in the “big kid” world, I wholeheartedly agree. Saving up as much as you can will give you this cushion and peace of mind that is unmistakably the best feeling. I can’t tell you how many times I went to bed so stressed about paying rent and all of my bills. The feeling of knowing you’ll be financially okay in the morning is absolutely gratifying. Knowing that you’ll also have money to go on a trip after a bad week of work is an awesome feeling.
Other than saving, I’ve learned a lot. Below are lessons that I’ve learned the best and have impacted me the most.
Truthful Confessions of Living on My Own
- Learning to adult without your mom is tough. Have you ever tried dealing with insurance stuff, budgeting, your own apartment, etc. without her by your side? It’s not pleasant and puts a mind tornado in your head to scramble up your brain. Biggest advice: learn all the terminology so it’s easier to grasp and make the best decisions.
- FaceTime is never enough. Seeing my friends and family on a tiny screen will never fill the hole of not seeing your loved ones regularly. It’s wonderful to cuddle your little siblings or to hug your mom or watch a sports game with your dad could never be duplicated with a screen.
- Catching up is never easy. Listening to what all of your loved ones are up to hurts your heart a little bit. It’s great that people have stories to share with you but you get a sense that you’re missing out. You want to be sharing these memories with them even though you’re creating many of your own.
- You’re alone. You’re, of course, supported by them but you’re alone doing things how you feel is correct (typically not but at least you tried). You’re not coming home from a day of work to Mom’s cooking or your childhood dog’s kisses. You’re coming home to this little environment you’ve created and attempting to cook God knows what.
- You’re creating your own life. You’re building your own tribe, your own hobbies, your own adventures. You may be alone but you’re alone creating your own world. It’s special and extremely exciting!
- You’re alone but independent. You don’t need permission. You don’t need to worry about conflicting schedules. You don’t need to keep checking in with your parents. You’re making your own decisions.
- You have control of your life. Every decision, every choice, and every moment is in your control. Even the tough choices, you get to choose the lesser of the two evils. It’s phenomenal, really.
- You learn a lot about yourself in a life of independence. You make a complete 180 degree change as you learn about who in the world you are. You learn the kind of life you want to live and work towards your dream life.
It’s tough living away from your old life but its truly wonderful. I love my life, although I do have a lot to discover and miss the humans that have a hold on my heart. Let me know down in the comments what you’ve learned and any hardships you’ve faced!